"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never harm me."
In one way that statement makes sense, but yet in another it's seen as foolish; allow me to explain...
My mother would always tell us that when a person or persons make un-true and negative comments about us we should always remember that we are the children of God and He never makes junk; in fact, we are who He predestined us to be.... "Agree?"
So how do we apply that same thought to those moments when we're verbally threatened, berated, or caught-up in the heat of an argument. How should our psyche respond or react to the verbal fits of rage aimed at us from those whom we love and respect?
Jesus said in John 6:63 - "the words I speak unto you they are Spirit and they are life..."
The same holds true for the words we send in each others direction.
When one person belittles another with harsh words the reaction takes on a plethora of forms:
1. Anger and retaliation
2. Low self esteem
3. Deep depression
4. Negative reinforcement
5. Oppression
6. Self-hatred and hatred of others
7. Bodily harm and/or murder
The list is lengthy because words take on a life form of their own.
In so many cases people are known to use their tongue as a dangerous weapon which can kill a persons influence and assassinate their character...James 3:6 states:
"...and the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell."
What we say out of our mouths is also an identifier of our true nature and character. Proverbs 15:1-2 says; "A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly, but the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness."
It's always easy to incite an argument, make snide remarks or simply just gossip about someone, however in the life of a true disciple it should be even easier to avoid bickering by speaking positive and encouraging words to others.
Even so; our children are very deeply effected by the words we use. It pains me to hear a parent using profanity around and against their children, my heart aches each time I hear a parent or any adult refer to a child by using profane and negative titles.
We must be very careful when labling our young.
Mom, haven't you realized that each time you say to your son; "you're just like your jail-bird dad" you've just discouraged the scientist in him and set that young man on a course which leads to a life of crime?
Dad, don't you understand that when you constantly say to your daughter; "your mamma was no good and you're just like her" that you've just murdered a world renound educator, and in-turn created a drug addict who prostitutes herself for a fix?
Hebrews11:1-3 (NLT) reads; "Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. Through their faith, the people in days of old earned a good reputation. But by faith we understand that the entire universe was formed at God's command, that what we now see did not come from anything that can be seen."
Simply put, God spoke positively and the world existed... and in His word we are instructed to employ all wisdom in teaching and admonishing one another... (ref. Colossians 3:16)
One of my favorite movies is "The Outlaw Josey Wales". In the movie there is a scene where Josey boldly rides into the village of the feared Comanche chief Ten Bears and the ensuing dialogue takes place...
Josey: You be Ten Bears?
Ten Bears: I am Ten Bears.
Josey: (spits tobacco) I'm Josey Wales.
Ten Bears: I have heard. You're the Gray Rider. You would not make peace with the Blue Coats. You may go in peace.
Josey: I reckon not. Got nowhere to go.
Ten Bears: Then you will die.
Josey: I came here to die with you. Or live with you. Dying ain't so hard for men like you and me, it's living that's hard; when all you ever cared about has been butchered or raped. Governments don't live together, people live together. With governments you don't always get a fair word or a fair fight. Well I've come here to give you either one, or get either one from you. I came here like this so you'll know my word of death is true. And that my word of life is then true. The bear lives here, the wolf, the antelope, the Comanche. And so will we. Now, we'll only hunt what we need to live on, same as the Comanche does. And every spring when the grass turns green and the Comanche moves north, he can rest here in peace, butcher some of our cattle and jerk beef for the journey. The sign of the Comanche, that will be on our lodge. That's my word of life.
Ten Bears: And your word of death?
Josey: It's here in my pistols, there in your rifles. I'm here for either one.
Ten Bears: These things you say we will have, we already have.
Josey: That's true. I ain't promising you nothing extra. I'm just giving you life and you're giving me life. And I'm saying that men can live together without butchering one another.
Ten Bears: It's sad that governments are chiefed by the double-tongues. There is iron in your word of death for all Comanche to see. And so there is iron in your words of life. No signed paper can hold the iron, it must come from men. The words of Ten Bears carries the same iron of life and death. It is good that warriors such as we meet in the struggle of life... or death. It shall be life.
(he takes his knife and cuts his hand. Josey does the same and they grasp each others hand.)
These two men understood fully well that they each had the ability to both kill and be killed soley based on the myths and ideas of their perspective cultures; yet they chose their words wisely, and were equally wise enough to see the good in both cultures, which lead them to form a covenant that would establish a positive and productive peace between the two.
The moral of this message is a simple one:
First: Always be slow to become angry and refuse to resort to using harsh words against each other.
Second: Refrain from placing negative labels on your children, instead use encouraging words that lead them to fulfilling their God given destiny.
Third: Resist gossip and falsehoods about others at all cost, for those whom you think ill of or speak negative about just may be your "predestined assignment."
...and the peace of God which passeth all understanding will keep your heart and mind, through Christ.
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